2010

I have attempted to write this post about 15 times I am just not sure what I want to say. 2009 has not been terrible, it has not been super. But I have made it through with my health, my house, my marriage and my job in tact. I am still here alive and kick'n. I guess the lyrics to this song sum it up for me. Happy New Year everyone.

The Wonder if if All(Next Year) by Monday Morning
All my hopes and dreams inside
Visions lurk behind my eyes
Something new behind it grows
And You smile as my heart knows
To be another still with You
I'm the one that loved You through
But I'm still nothing next to You
I'm still nothing next to You
What I've seen and where I've been
What's breaking out and breaking in
Who I love and I despise
Melting into compromise
How I've changed and how I've learned
Becoming less becoming more
And I'm still nothing next to You
I'm still nothing without You

The sickness my mind's battled long
The center of my every song
The beauty of my voice it fades
Into a spiritual cascade
Flowing form Your perfect smile
I've avoided all the while
But I'm still nothing next to You
I'm still nothing next to You
All the future seems unclear
Never moving never near
But You hold me as I scream
Wake me from my wicked dream
Something out there waits for me
Hand in hand we wait for it
But I'm still nothing next to You
I'm still nothing without You

[Chorus]
And the wonder of it all is I'm still standing
And the wonder of it all is we're still standing
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com
Never planned it
And I wonder where I'll be next year

Will You stand right next to me
Will You hold me faithfully
Should I question all these things
What makes me so deserving
Of something that I've thrown away
Coming back for me today
When I'm still nothing next to You
I'm still nothing next to You
Hearts are broken just to mend
When will my brokenness end
Lending my mind to dreams it seems
Some things are never meant to be
But faith it lingers as I die
Inside surrendering I cry
I'm still nothing next to You
I'm still nothing without You

[Chorus]
And the wonder of it all is I'm still standing
And the wonder of it all is we're still standing
Never planned it
And I wonder where I'll be next year

Time is a broken dream
Time is an endless change
Time is an offering
Time has the endless sting
Time has a world to bring
Time, it's a broken dream
Mended while lovers sing

[Chorus]
And the wonder of it all is I'm still standing
And the wonder of it all is we're still standing
Never planned it
And I wonder where I'll be next year

Christmas reflections

Christmas eve went off pretty well for my family. It was organized chaos but that is how we roll so no big deal. My nieces and nephews had great fun and were so excited with all they received. My nephew in the air force arrived earlier than anticipated(earlier by 5 hours!) which was the greatest joy and gift for me. He was able to open his presents, eat a warm meal and visit with everyone before anyone had to leave for other commitments.

Christmas day was just me and the hubs. A low key day to concentrate on each other and the reason for the season, Jesus. We had a nice day and it was back to work for him the day after Christmas. Ah sales, the hours and days suck, but oh well.

My biggest reflection is how lucky we(my family)are to be able to see each other nearly every year. All the brothers in town this year and nearly all the kids, it was great. With two in the military, and one headed to college next year, I will not take for granted any time with them. I am thankful for all my family and realize I am truly blessed.

Yes I did Friday

Yes I did Friday has come around again, join the fun stop in and visit Jeanette's blog and tell us what you did!


Yes I did beg Jeanette and Shana to explain to me how to be a part of this blog meme and the virtual cookie exchange. They were gracious and used small words.. and here I am with my first yes I did post.

Yes I did fake being sick 2 days this week so I did not have to go to the gym with my hubs at 4:00am.

Yes I did make 3 batches of fudge, 2 batches of buckeyes and 3 batches of shortbread this week. I am worn out.

Yes I did take a morning off of work just to spend some time with my husband, it was fun.

What did you do this week!

BUCKEYES

Ok gals, I promised the buckeyes too and I think Tracie said she was keeping the exchange going through today, stop by her blog and see if there is anything new!

Buckeyes

1-1/3 stick margarine melted

12 ounce jar chunky peanut butter

1 box powder sugar

12 oz chocolate chips

¼ bar paraffin wax, (available in the canning section at the grocery store)



Combine the melted margarine, peanut butter and powder sugar stir until smooth. Roll in to a big ball cover and chill in refrigerator over night. Roll the dough into little balls about a tablespoon or smaller if you like. Keep them cool in the fridge.

Melt 12 oz. Of chocolate chips with the ¼ bar of paraffin wax until smooth and mixed together (I use my electric fondue pot to melt the wax & chips) Dip the dough in the chocolate with a toothpick or skewer leaving a portion of the dough showing (looks like a buckeye). Put on a cookie sheet to cool until the chocolate is set.

Store in an airtight container in the refrigerator, will keep for several weeks.

** The wax may sound kind of weird, but it makes the chocolate hard but does affect the taste of the candy and yes it is safe to eat!

Shortbread

Thanks Tracie for hosting this virtual cookie recipe exchange! Check it out for some new recipes.

Here it goes ladies, I am submitting my much loved shortbread recipe with you all! What is the point of having a great recipe and not sharing so here you go!

Shortbread:

Ingredients
1 pound(4 sticks) good quality butter at room temperature
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup superfine or baker's sugar
4 cups flour

Method:
Preheat oven to 325 degrees f
Put butter in a large bowl, using a wooden spoon, stir butter so it is no longer in the sticks but all incorporated together. Add salt and sugar mix together. Add 1 cup flour and stir until well mixed. Repeat this step, stirring with the wooden spoon for cup 2 and cup 3 of flour. Add the last cup of flour, put down your wooden spoon and begin to knead the dough with your hands mixing well. Once the dough is thoroughly mixed, keep kneading. When you are tired of kneading, knead some more. I usually try and knead it about 5 minutes. The dough should not be sticky. If it is, add flour 1 tablespoon at at time until is no longer sticky.

Turn it out into a 15x10x7 jelly roll type pan. spread evenly in the pan, use a rolling pin to smooth it out. prick the entire surface of the dough with a fork and crimp the edges with the back of the fork.

Bake for 45 minutes or until a golden brown. Remove from oven and cut immediately in to small squares (I usually get 70 pieces per batch) and sprinkle with a little more superfine sugar. cool completely and then remove from the pan. Enjoy!

A lesson and a rant

I will start with a disclaimer to this post. I harbor no ill will to "people" that live in the bay area or Los Angeles, just what transpires in Central Cali due to the pollution from those areas..

A lesson.
The Central Valley is like a big bowl. The wind comes from the Northwest goes over the Sierra's and heads East. Except when the wind is not blowing. The smog and air pollution from the bay area and to some degree Los Angeles (when it is on fire) stacks up against the Sierra's and causes bad air quality. Some of the bad air in the summer is caused by the ag industry locally but I am addressing fall and winter air quality.
My Rant.
The air quality board had decided that they can tell me when I can and when I can not use my fireplace. They have mandatory no burn days at least 30 days during the winter months. You risk a fine (50 bucks first offense, 300 bucks second) The last 3 days have been the coldest this year and guess what?? No burning! I am a taxpayer, who the heck are you to tell me I can not use a fire to warm my house and lower my energy bill? Why do some counties with air quality indexes 2 numbers off from us get to burn and we can not? Why do we have to suffer because of the smog of other areas or the way the wind blows? Why must you triple the number of no burn days regardless of the actual air quality? Just to flex your power and authority? Ok, my whiny rant is over.

Now to be fair, I do not have any breathing problems or heath issues, neither does my husband. But I know plenty of people with asthma and breathing problems and this gets worse with bad air quality. I know emissions and air quality are important locally and globally. I just get tired of the government (local, state and federal) and their ever increasing control over my life and everyday decisions.It just feels like another way of interfering with my life.
I am going to try and be a good citizen and not break the rules...unless I have to. Oh and a really hate anyone telling what to do.ever.

That's all

Holiday Baking, 70 down 560 to go

I just got my first batch of holiday baking done and shipped off. What do I make? Glad you asked, shortbread! It all started about 12 years ago when I asked a coworker for her recipe. She declined at first saying it was a family recipe of a friend and she promised to never give it out. Well I finally wore her down, promising myself to never give it out.. and I haven't (fingers crossed) well, only a few times.12 years later, and about a 650 pieces a year made, I am still at it. I only make it at Christmas and my list of who I give to seems to keep growing. In addition to shortbread, I will make buckeyes and fudge. Last year I did truffles and buckeyes, but there will always be shortbread no matter what else I make. I must be crazy! But I do it for the people I care about because they are special to me. And because I have one co-worker who will say to me, "I look forward to this every year, thank you." And that is why I do it.
Are you planning any holiday baking? If so, what are your baking traditions, what is a must in your arsenal of baked goodies? Anything new you want to try? Michelle (one of them) at Fellowship had something I want to try with golden graham cereal..That will be the next thing I try.


That's all☺

Post Script to Thanksgiving..a little late

Our thanksgiving went off well..dinner was late, tables looked ok, my brother and family left one hour after arrival for other functions but over all, we had a great time. I am so glad I took the position I did and just went with it. We still laughed,ate too much and felt blessed to able to be together one more year. Friday was a drag, I got sick and now am finally feeling better. I was not so sick I could not get my Christmas decorations up, but spent most the weekend in what I like to call "Thanksgiving host hangover".
All and all a good lesson in general for me to just chill and go with it and I am happier for it.

That's all.

Go with it.. and relax...

I know I am going to get stressed. I know I want everything to be just perfect. I know I do not like to go with the flow, it has to be the way I planned it or else it won't be right. I know someone will piss me off and I do not hide my feelings well, they are written all over my face. I know someone will be late, it is always the same person. I know someone will forget to bring what they were supposed to bring and I will be irritated.I IT has to be perfect, go off without a hitch because I planned it that way.

So...after my little confession, I am praying for balance. Really, is anything ever exactly perfect? No, so I will balance my desire for perfect with grace and understanding for the late one, the forgetful one, the irritating one, the loud one and the annoying one. I will make a choice right now to let the day flow how ever it flows. To realize I am blessed beyond measure with family, a home, a job, my heath, so many others are not as fortunate. To not worry about the time the meal actually makes it to the table. To concentrate more on the people in the room than what the room actually looks like. To slow down and realize these beautiful beings in my life have far more value than anything that can go wrong or right in the day tomorrow. I will make an effort to let each one know they matter to me and make my life a better one.


And that, is what will make my day a successful one. And thinking about them, has already made my day better today.

Happy Thanksgiving and may you all be blessed with a wonderful peaceful happy day.

That's all..♥

Thanksgiving memories

I have been preparing myself for Thanksgiving next week. I am hosting my family this year. There will be about 16 of us, smaller than usual, but we will have fun. I always miss the big huge family gatherings and get nostalgic for those days.
My favorite Thanksgiving of all was when I around, oh 7 or 8 years old There are 5 kids in my family and my mom's sister family there was 4. The sister's always did there best to be together for the holidays. This particular year my mom was hosting. The big dilemma was seating. How were we going to fit the entire group of us not including the grand parents from all sides and the other aunts and cousins due to show up. The question was answered with a ping pong table! My mom took the net off the ping pong table, did her best with some sort of table cloth, set the chairs around it,and we had our Thanksgiving meal in the garage gathered around a ping pong table. It was a joyous day and a great family time one I will never forget. My brother and I were just excited to be at the big table instead of the kids table that we were usually relinquished to.
As I look back at that memory and all the faces that surrounded the table that day, my heart longs to see some of those faces again. Many have long since left this earth and are in heaven. Part of me wishes to see those faces again, this year, this time surrounding my table. With the echos of their laughter, their smiles and their love. That is not to be, but I will carry this cherished memory and when we gather again next week, each one will not be far from my thoughts and I will send up a prayer of thanks for each one and what they meant in my life.

That's all

What are your cherished Thanksgiving memories?

Rewind

Don't you wish there was a rewind button on bad days? If there was, I would rewind and start yesterday all over. I can be a very short sighted and well to be honest a selfish person. I did not want to be at the family function yesterday. I did not want to change the normal scheduled time to accommodate my sister in laws stupid function. I did not want to play any games or chit chat. And that was abundantly clear to my hosts, my bro and his wife. So I should not have been surprised by the angry call from my brother hours later about what the heck is your problem? He was angry and hurt by my attitude and lack of respect I demonstrated..Ick.

see, I was so concerned about myself I failed to recognize their hard work and efforts. Having 20 people in your home when your kids are sick. Hosting the 3rd birthday party in 2 weeks. Just trying to have a fun day of games and family fellowship. Creating a positive family day as we celebrated their daughters first birthday.
Selfishness is an ugly thing it can blind you to what is really important. I don't know how many more times we will all be able to be together. We are fortunate to be close in distance to each other and I know it is not that way in all families. I genuinely love my family and our celebrations. I guess I just had a bad case of being self absorbed. While apologies have been made, and accepted I still wish there was a rewind button on the day...I know I would have done it different.

That's all.

Your a Mean one Mr. Schwarzenegger

Ok, my first rant. When the state of California finally passed the budget this year, they added a provision that I think most of the population did not know about. Starting November 2nd until the end of year, and additional 10% is being with held from paychecks as a no interest loan to the state. It is not a "tax increase" just a loan. And when you file for your state returns next year, you get it back. So, the two toughest months in the year to make ends meet,with the holidays and all I get to give the state an extra $320.00 net. So makes my Christmas shopping budget harder, food budget for the holidays tighter..yeah thanks Grinch..I mean Gov. Then, when I file my tax return in April, I will probably wait until July or August to even see my refund, if there is even any money left.
This state is in such disrepair as it is I say starting right at the top, fire em all, let us start over and get people who do not have an agenda, care about the state and it's people.
But for now I say Your a mean one, Mr Grinch!er...Mr. Governor.

That's all...

HI

This is my first foray into the world of blogging. I have followed a few blogs one I really liked that blew up into smithereens for various reasons. Found a few after the fall out that I liked. Prompted me to start my own. So here I am. And any drama here? will be my own..lol